To Write With Passion

I published my website about a month ago. All my new content will be published there. Feel free to visit: To Write With Passion I hope to see you there. Monse

Do you ever wish you could reach out to someone to tell them some good news, but this person is no longer in your life and you have no way of communicating because you deleted all forms of communication long ago? Because at the time, you were so angry and hurt. I'm sure we all go through this at one point or another.                                         *** It's been a little over 9 months. And in the past couple of weeks, the year is slowly shaping out to be a good year. I was able to go on vacation for a week and a half and it was one of my favorite vacations I've been on. The first few days were completely liberating since I went off to Texas completely alone. I met some great people there, saw some amazing sights, and never truly felt alone during my time in both San Antonio and Austin. Then I went off to Orlando with my best friend to celebrate our 13 years of friendship. ...

You may think the title is a mistake, but it's not. This is a happy blog post. And I don't just mean a positive one. I mean, it's genuinely about me being happy. It's crazy. And I know this happiness may not be long lasting. But all I know is that in this moment, I feel happy. I accomplished some things that I didn't think I would be able to accomplish this week. I conquered a few small, but significant feats. They were personal feats that I wanted to accomplish, but didn't know when I'd be ready to take the plunge. You may have noticed in one of my earlier blogs this year how I mentioned that I had begun a new chapter of my dating life. Well, that was put on a break for a few months up until a few weeks ago. I had gone out and met a few guys a few months after my breakup, but it was still relatively tough for me to get back out there. The reason was that dating was and is still a very challenging task. Meeting new people has never been easy for me. Espe...

I've mentally and emotionally drained myself out the past couple of months. For what? I honestly don't know. I let my emotions get the best of me. I let one experience ruin my outlook on life. It's the one thing I didn't want to do and yet, I couldn't help it. I've literally sank to the bottom at one point and didn't want to get back up. The point is, I'm done caring too much when it's not needed. I'm done over worrying. I'm done letting myself drown in my own self pity. I'm not invalidating my depression. I'm not saying that it's cured miraculously or that I will never experience another downfall again. I'm just saying that I'm done letting it take over me. Life is about choices and how we act upon those choices. We make mistakes. And I need to learn to move on from those mistakes. One of those mistakes is possibly keeping this blog up for so long without trying to look for other mediums. Which is why in the next few ...

Around the middle of January, I decided to give something up; social media. It wasn't a difficult decision. After years and years of it consuming a huge part of my life and my constant need to have my phone on me at all times made it clear. I needed to stop. Part of it was because I just felt like it was taking over my life. Another reason was that I just relied on it so much to provide some sort of comfort in knowing what people were always up to. Facebook was always my least favorite and initially was meant to update and connect with family in Mexico and close friends. Well, it turned into more than that and it became a negative source for me over time. I had already deleted my original account and created a new account with only a few select family and friends, but I hastily decided that I needed to rid of it altogether. Next was Instagram. I loved Instagram because it allowed me to share the pictures I took, which I absolutely love to do. But with all the new updates over the...

Tenía 6 meses cuando mis padres trajeron a mí y a mis hermanos a los Estados Unidos. Querían una vida mejor para nosotros. Esperaban que tuviéramos más de lo que ya teníamos en México. Eso es lo que esperaban. I'm sorry, this is America. In America, we speak English. I was brought to the United States as a 6 month old baby with my siblings. My parents, hoping for a better future and more opportunities, uprooted our family here. That's what they hoped. I've been here for about 26 years of my life. 1 and a half of those years were spent in Mexico. One year was spent back in Mexico when I was 4 years old. I still had a visa then so we were able to go back. I was about 5 when I came back with a visa. Still a child and still naive to what our situation would later become. At 27 years old, I am an undocumented immigrant, or illegal alien as some would say. 22 of those years were lived with the uncertainty of what the next day would bring living here undocumented. I could ...

Today is the third day of 2018. So far, my year has consisted of a 20 hour drive back from Phoenix, Arizona and a full day of working at home from the comfort of my bed. With a paid week vacation behind me, I am back at work and looking forward to a fresh start. I'm not going to lie and say that 2017 was great. It was far from great. It had its moments, sure. But it was full of many upsetting and painful ones. I have never looked more forward to entering a new year and leaving the one behind me in the past.  I must say that I'm proud I managed to squeeze in some last minute changes in the last few weeks of 2017, including moving into a new place to claim my independence and entering a new chapter of my dating life. I've done a complete turn around of where I started the year. I've made some small positive changes in the hopes that 2018 would be MY year. I don't want to start off the way I started last year. Side note: It feels so great to finally be able to refe...

I know life doesn't change one day from the next or one week from the next. But I can at least say that life does change at least in small ways each day. The last week has been relatively better than the past few combined. I'm extremely grateful for the way this year has shaped out to be simply because everything that was thrown my way has impacted my growth moving forward. I can't say that life will be completely better from now on. I don't know that. I just know that I have to take small steps each day towards making that happen. I'm done dwelling on the past. Part of growing up is letting go of everything that's caused pain. And to do so, you need to forgive, forget and move on.  I'm not perfect. I'm not blaming anyone or anything. Shit happens. And this year has been a prime example of how making changes and taking risks can create an impact. Honestly, if someone had told me a year ago that I would have three new ear piercings, a hairstyle ch...

For the longest time, I’ve tried to live up to standards and people’s expectations of what they want me to be. And it’s been a difficult journey. I’ve always been a model child in my parents eyes. I didn’t keep them up worrying late at night like my siblings because I didn’t party. Not that they were party animals. They were always just more social than me. I told myself I would never drink because I saw how much my mom worried when my brother drank. She didn’t allow me to find a job while in college so that I could finish school and get my degree. I didn’t go out. I studied. I helped my parents at their jobs while juggling schoolwork. I had a routine: school, homework, work. That’s all I could focus on. I appreciated the fact that my parents were supporting me and my dreams to finish college. But looking back, if I had it my way, things would have been slightly different. I didn’t even want to touch alcohol until I was the legal age of 21. When I finally did, I enjoyed i...

Life is interesting. You never know what to expect. The past few days, I have struggled to write. I have struggled to figure out what to say. I've felt lost. Frankly, I've fallen back into the depths of darkness. The place I have been unable to bring myself out of. I know it will get easier over time. I just need to let go. I need to move forward and leave the past behind me. I need to leave everything that has hurt me and brought me pain behind. That's the only way to learn. And the only way to get over this. Right now, I don't understand why things happen the way they do. But one day, I might understand. I hope I will. It's hard to figure out where to go from here. It's hard to imagine the future sometimes. But I've managed so far. I'm starting to make some changes. It's all about me right now. It's about what I need for myself. As hard as it was to let go, I needed to do it for me. I couldn't move on while holding onto something that was...

Time drifts away before we know it. Change is inevitable. We learn, we grow, and we find ourselves. Within this lifetime, we will come across people who will impact our lives in one way or another. We will create memories and begin new adventures. As we grow, we have to make difficult decisions. We have to focus on ourselves along the way and not let anyone or anything get in our way of bettering ourselves. Unfortunately, sometimes this means we need to distance ourselves from any sort of negativity that follows us. Whether it be an obstacle or a person that is getting in our way. I've learned a lot about myself over the past years and this year alone. I've learned about strength and perseverance. I'm sure there is still a lot left to learn, not just about myself, but about life itself. We will go through many obstacles that will test our strength. I firmly believe that we are only faced with battles that we can overcome and endure. It's up to us to decide how we wi...

 It's amazing what you'll find when you immerse yourself in nature. I would love to go on more adventures and further explore all the great views. Sometimes a breath of fresh air is all we need. We need to realize that there is so much this world has to offer. One bump in the road can't knock us down. We just have to get back on track and admire the view while we can.

Roberts Regional Recreation Area  There are days where I get the sudden urge to write and all I wish to do is write. Last night I began working on an old story I recently revisited, thinking it would be left aside and never completed. Recently, I've been inspired by many things that made me want to go back and finish the story. All that was missing was something that made myself get hooked into continue writing it, fleshing it out and starting over while only keeping a few details. Sometimes it helps to take a step back from your work if you don't feel satisfied and then going back to it until something clicks. This picture will serve as my model as the story takes place in a forest. I feel like the toughest part about writing stories for me is staying focused on one idea and not getting tired of it or thinking it's too plain. But writing is all about revision and we must write until we feel satisfied with the stories we wish to tell. Storytelling is a never ending...

Writing is not for everyone. But for those who enjoy it, it is everything. Unfortunately, I don't do enough of it. Sometimes just the sound of my fingers typing against the keyboard is enough to make me want to start brainstorming ideas and begin writing. And that's exactly what I'm intending to do. I'm fully intent on finally working on a book. I know what I want it to be about and I have some ideas of what I wish to include. But first, I want to establish myself. To do that, I have started a Facebook page in order to promote myself, slowly, but surely. Follow, like, or share: https://www.facebook.com/towritewithpassion/?ref=aymt_homepage_panel (Look at that self promo.) I find myself constantly coming up with excuses for why I haven't started writing or working on my book. The truth is that I'm honestly just lazy. I haven't been giving myself the time to write. When I do have time, I blame my lack of inspiration. As I get older, I realize that I'm ...

"It is never too late or too soon. It is when it is supposed to be." -Mitch Albom. This quote is from a book I recently read, The Time Keeper. It resonates with me more now than before. We live in a time where we worry about time going too fast or too slow. We worry about not having enough time. The truth is that life is short. Rather than worry about how fast or slow something is going, we should focus on the present. Time is constantly ticking. And often we forget that we live once. We shouldn't focus on time itself. If we do, we get lost in it and miss out on many things that life has to offer. People will judge and criticize, but it's up to you to decide when you want to move forward.

The saying is true: "Good things come to those who wait." I used to think it was just a saying people went by without really believing in it. It was one of those things that I said to myself, and wanted to believe, but couldn't. I spent most of my childhood being afraid of opening up to people. Some people call it shyness. Doctors will call it social anxiety. I will simply call it letting fear get the best of me. This is not to dismiss my anxiety disorder or any type of disorder. But I don't want that to be how I define myself. I've spent most of my life wondering why I was different. Why I couldn't be as outgoing like all the other kids. Or why I couldn't make friends as easily. But I never stopped and wondered why I thought it was a bad thing. I guess it comes with the stigma that if something is wrong with you, then you're not normal. Whatever normal even means. I can't remember the moment I thought to myself, "I'm not crazy, I'm ...

What does it mean to write with passion? It all started one day when I was creating a tumblr page. I was trying to come up with a name for my page. My original attempt was "passionate writer." After that didn't work, I tried to come up with different variations of it such as, "passion writer" which was already taken so I tried "writing with passion," which was also taken. So I thought, "What about 'to write with passion.'' It worked. To be honest, at first, I didn't like the sound of it. It didn't seem right to start a title with the word "to." Being the English major that I am, it bothered me that I was starting the sentence with a conjunction. But, of course, English has taught me that you may break the rules and according to one website, it's recommended to start sentences with a conjunction in order to be a good writer. I'm digressing, but now that I look back, I feel as though this title not only suits my...